Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Loop Zero Energy Drink Review

The achromatized can here has no shame in this store brand paraphrase of certain Monster and Rockstar varieties. The uninspired and etiolated design is not too shabby for K-Mart however, a business today something of a poorer's-man's Wal Mart. But I am going on a limb hailing this as "Loop Zero," as the only text new here is the haloing 'zero calories... zero sugar.' You know you have a great drink when it does not even have a proper name!

Cracking open a can unleashes a mendaciously violent effervescence, dulled to a uninteresting crawl with our first sip. The flavor is, wait, do I need to tell you?! A page or two short of a chapter taken from Monster's book, grapefruit flavors are jejune and the nubilous citruses cocktail is fatigued. Presented with zero flair on the palate, the inert fruits are less exotic than water, and only serve the purpose of tediously peeving the frugal drinker. The handful of change saved probably taste better than this.

Each can contains: caffeine (160 milligrams), B vitamins, ginseng, inositol, and taurine. Here we have a kick as generic as the rest of the experience, lasting two and a half hours. Now, I am not saying you should be drinking Monster Zero Ultra, or even Rockstar Pure Zero, but steer very clear of Loop Zero (or what ever it is really called).

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