Monster Assault Energy Drink Re-Review

Since the time of my original review for Monster Assault, its can has been updated slightly, with a darkened camouflage pattern and with some minor rearrangements as the only real changes. But it successfully makes it that more appealing. The darkened colours give a grim tone to the whole militant apparel, and the movement of the word "Assault," the only actual arrangement, helps the design flow with more ease. But there is something that bothers me, and that would be the back text. It claims that "the camo pattern helps [the company] fight against the big multi-national companies that dominate the beverage business," but last time I checked, Monster is distributed by one of those big companies, and along with Red Bull, it dominates the energy drink market.

Monster Assault's taste is fairly different from what I remember, but it isn't much better. Beginning initially with a smooth vanilla layered upon a faint cinnamon, the flavour soon grows a pleasant cherry focus. This section of the experience is reminiscent of most mainstream cherry colas, but I don't mean that it a positive light. The cherry tastes a bit too sugary sweet, and it lacks any sense of vibrancy. Following is a base braid of bubble gum and apple, both strangled by a harsh level of gumminess, and resting atop is an even more displeasing though more subtle chemical taste. The latter has a metallic feel to it and a bland condensed form of the vanilla and cinnamon. With each sip taken the chemical taste is gradually disciplined, and it eventually becomes wholly muted. But replacing it is a candied orange who's sweetness is syrupy, thick and cloying. The orange taste is simple and one dimensional, and has a sharp citric quality. The carbonation is generally unremarkable, doing little but keeping the drink from being flat. Overall, Monster Assault in theory tastes quite good; a classic cola body with strong but not total focus on cherry, but sadly they decided to add unnecessary characteristics that just clutter and distract the flavour.

Each can contains: a variety of B vitamins, taurine, caffeine(160mg), ginseng, guarana, and inositol. This energy cocktail gave me a substandard buzz for a Monster, with energy only lasting around three hours. I had jitters rarely and the buzz ended with a crash worth mentioning. All in all, since its original release, I've seen only a handful of people drinking Monster Assault, which means that most don't need me to tell them it's a waste of money.

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