Monster Rehab Protean Energy Drink Review

Clever name aside, the company is inching towards total enervation of their arctic, once proud, and unique, can template that began with the first Rehab. You even could argue that it actually began with Absolutely Zero, sure, but my eyes have become bored regardless. I can't say, though, that the design is bad, far from it in fact, but how many times must consumers see the same thing before it's too much or too late?

The "protein" in "Protean" is surely the culprit of the beverage's sour milk scent, and also must help in the flavour's inappropriate creaminess. Each exposure tastes barely of berry, I'd reckon a darker variety but exact specifications are undisclosed and the absence of carbonation mucks up the relaxed nature that one expects with one without effervescence. The repulsive richness is most distinguished following the unconvincing flavour, but you do thankfully become sorta used to the unfit unctuousness. Sips never grow into gulps, however, and the large fifteen and a half ounce size can is always a chore. But the experience's biggest kick in the groin is actually the second rate saccharinity, as even without the callous creaminess, things would still be shamefully unsweetened. More sugar, artificial or real, is needed before Monster Rehab Protean is anything but a disgusting disappointment.

If you're able to actually finish an entire can then you should get a prize, not another average kick. Sure, the formulaic formulation provides a solid three hour buzz, but it isn't something we haven't had dozens of times before. Each can contains: 170 milligrams of caffeine, some protein, some B vitamins, and taurine. All in all, Monster Rehab Protean's blind ambitions get a few hundred calories worth of brownie points for being unique, not for being good. Oh heavens is it not good.

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