Mtn Dew VooDew 2024 Soda Review

Who is this drink for? One would surmise it would be for folks like me, the kind who live, breath and die caffeine, but I prefer my potent potables to clock in somewhere a bit less than 270 calories and nearly a day and a half of your recommended intake of sugar. I know at least my waist will thank me.

Not unlike this year's diet variation, my tongue is crippled immediately upon  liquid impact; though this time it is due to the seventy three grams of sugar inside these thin plastic walls, all from high fructose corn syrup, drowning my poor palate in a saccharine salvo of bare unnecessities. I taste peach and mango, both so distant and distracted by the gut-busting carbohydrates that sips end up being just indistinctly fruity. Effervescence leaves almost as soon as it arrives, leaving the texture to fend for itself, a very, ahem, syrupy mouthfeel. As for acidity, ha, I wish we had some sourness to steer the experience back on track. I do enjoy a good mystery, giving me a bit of a challenge as I pen the review, and I do truly go in blind. But then I like to see what the interwebs thinks, which a quick search shows that even the nebulous blob of folks online have no idea. Is it fruit punch? Some nostalgic candy? No one has any idea, but my opinion still stands: this drink sucks.

A soda with ninety one grams of caffeine means that to someone, somewhere, this will replace that morning cup of coffee. Not me though, I prefer my buzz to be one that I does not need to be followed by a long jog.

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Yerbaé Pumpkin Spice Energy Drink Review

Sometimes you stumble upon an energy drink and it instantly fills you with dread: why "this" flavor? Why "this" brand? Or my expression when I witnessed Yerbaé Pumpkin Spice: why "me?" I guess that is unfair to Yerbaé here, the can is an absolute joy to look at, the stark black backdrop really makes the orange pop. But come on, pumpkin spice tea?

Contrary to the words I just typed, I do try and give all products reviewed here the benefit of the doubt, but Yerbaé Pumpkin Spice is, hands down, one of the least appealing things I have ever splashed onto my tongue. There is a slight oiliness from the tea, the white variety used here, which immediately grabs onto your tastebuds, refusing to give way no matter how hard you try to ignore it. But for something that pretends to be "pumpkin spice," there is not only very little of the former but also almost none of the latter- rather the Stevia leaf extract makes the entire experience inappropriately sweet. It also cancels out nearly all of any bitterness the tea could have brought to the party, leaving only an undercurrent of earthiness to every imbibe. It is, in short, pretty terrible. Then there is the carbonation, which truly pushes this into the realm of unpalatable. Not only would being non-carbonation result in only fifteen ounces, instead of the present sixteen, to have to force down, but the tea would have felt a bit more at home. Kinda the way coffee has no reason coupling with effervescence, though that has not stopped companies before.

We do get 160 milligrams of caffeine, which is nice, but oh golly is the journey to feel that resulting two hour buzz a struggle. I do with the kick was a bit stronger, all things considering, but then again, the can never really calls itself an "energy drink." It certainly proclaims to provide energy, and it is a drink, but Yerbaé appears afraid of the implications with the soft drink genre.

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Monster Ultra Vice Guava Energy Drink Review

I am not sure why Monster here thinks guava is "ultra" or a "vice," but the textured can appeared in my local grocery store in an unmarked pile near the exit; either I found it before it could properly be displayed, or no one cares.

A gentle pull of the tab at the top, a slight pour and out comes a sharp pink. It does not have much in way of an odor, and first sip is only slightly more exciting. The sweetness, achieved by the unusual order of our usual friendly neighborhood blend of erythritol, ace-k and sucralose, hardly tastes diet, with just the texture lacking the honest heft of actual carbohydrates. I applaud that, and only that here. Guava is present but is uncommitted to delivering the full experience, its tartness threadbare and unfulfilling. I wanted my teeth to be punched through my mouth with every imbibe, but Monster here seems almost scared to dedicate an entire sixteen ounces to a single piece of produce, let alone one with such a particular personality.

Each can contains 150 milligrams of caffeine, a decent quantity that results in a decent two hour long kick. B vitamins, taurine, inositol, you know, your average suspects, round out the nutrition facts on the back of the metal transport. Overall, the only vice here is pretending to be one.

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Ghostbusters Oxyshred & Slime Energy Drink Review

Considering the age of the Ghostbusters license, making a very much not for kids energy drink does not seem so wrong; I mean, fans of the property when it first came out have been of drinking age for years. And the shrink-wrapped can goes straight for the nostalgia; even if Slimer is not who I would associate with the word "caffeine," it fully exploits its commercial novelty.

Pouring out the most artificial green this side of a candy shop, so far, so good. Then I stuck my nose up to the freshly-cracked can, and a big whiff had me immediately rip the opening from my face. I am not sure if I expected Granny Smith apple or something, but the aggressive passion fruit from the likes of NOS wafting from this viridescent elixir was not on my expectations list. The flavor is not like any of the above though, an odd combination of vanilla, lime and blue raspberry, though your tongue struggles to truly get to know any of the trio thanks to an absolutely assertory acidity. It all makes for an experience, right down to a slightly powdery texture, that resembles the physical act of munching on the confection SweeTARTS, but only just. What a bizarre little energy drink this is.

The 180 milligrams of caffeine lends itself to a nice two and a half hour long buzz, though it would be unprofessional of me not to mention how each can also contains: l-carnitine, B vitamins, vitamin C, taurine, guarana, and several others. Those are all fine-and-dandy, but that taste, man, what a trip.

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Red Bull The Winter Edition Iced Vanilla Berry Energy Drink Review

Leaves are falling as pumpkin spice rules every coffee shop in town, but that does not stop Red Bull from skipping a season and unleashing to the caffeinated world their 2024 "Winter Edition," this time allegedly "Iced Vanilla Berry" flavored. The can has this soft blue, augmented by the spurts of silver, that really does give the impression of a chilly January day, but then I look at my calendar and see it still reads "September."

Pouring out the light azure liquid fills your nose with memories of your childhood candy shop, the first sip is a sweet and sour ride. Mouthfuls are interesting and intricate, tasting both of vanilla and berry but coming together in a fashion that resembles cotton candy, but not excessively or expressly an experience designed for children. There is nuance here, the spice being full-bodied and on the cusp of being complex before it is interrupted by the fruitiness, which is mostly blue and raspberry, a far less technical flavor that sees the elixir leaving the palate with a clean finish. But the biggest draw here is the acidity: this is tart, impressively so, not shying away from making the edges of your lips curl slightly. It cuts through the thirty eight grams of sugar and glucose to allow for a beverage that is not afraid to go off the well-dranken path.

With just 114 milligrams of caffeine, the buzz is mild and hardly registers on my internal stimulant meter. I suppose there is something to be said about a more restrictive kick in the days of Bang and G Fuel, but what that is I do not know.

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Mtn Dew Zero Sugar VooDew 2024 Soda Review

It is time for candy corn, or at least it is according to PepsiCo, who's Mtn Dew has their annual "VooDew" out on store shelves. This here is 2024's diet edition, oh I am sorry, their "Zero Sugar" edition. Nomenclature be damned.

The can looks good as per usual, but what could be this year's flavor? Cheap compound chocolate? Plastic Halloween mask? Or what about raw carving pumpkin? Who knows, but my body is willing to bet it ain't candy corn.

Pouring out a crystal clear, the scent is indistinctly fruity, but the flavor is trash: it has the awkward astringency of artificial peach, complete with an equally unpleasant sham creaminess. It just does not work together, failing not only as a holiday treat but also as an experience all together, which should have been priority number one for the brand. Banana is also here, for some reason, contributing nothing except more bewilderment; it does not work as a nuance because nothing here works cohesively. Sucralose and ace-k are the sweetener system at play but they put up no fight to the acidity, which is about the only good thing I could think of- this is more sour than sugary soft drink. Mouthfuls, despite being served chilled, taste somehow slightly warm, as if it needs to be surrounded in dry ice to truly be frosty on the tongue, so I gulped and gulped and my palate winced as every nasty ounce coated it. This tastes worse than trick-or-treaters toilet papering your house.

The buzz is weak, but that is OK, since this is not an energy drink. It is a soda, so the sixty eight milligrams of my namesake chemical mean that you can chug a few cans to ease into the kick. Or, you know, you could do that with a better tasting Mtn Dew.

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Mega Energy by Lidl Energy Drink Review

Lidl's Mega Energy is, well, an energy drink, and it is awkward to read the word "energy" twice on an otherwise sterile can. At least it is not shrink-wrapped, but it is painfully generic, a green explosion that amounts to zero personality on the otherwise black backdrop. Is it any different from the same-named drink from 2018? The world may never know.

Well, it is a Red Bull clone, what did you expect? It is what I expected after all, a person who has experienced oh so many potent potables before. It is not a bad one fortunately, a bit too sweet to be honest, but considering this retails for less than a dollar, I have paid more for worse tasting things. Vanilla and apple are the nucleus to the flavor, containing a heavy chemical influence making for sips that taste straight from the science lab instead of mother nature. Cutting through the sixty four grams of sugar (and 270 calories) is a hearty acidity and a relatively creamy texture, neither quite strong enough to prevent the feeling that this golden bubbly cocktail is going right to my hips, but there is something here. Capping off each imbibe is bubble gum, the final feature of the famous profile it pillaged, leaving behind an aftertaste that lingers a bit too long. There are some problems here in Lidl's sixteen ounce produce, for sure, but this is ain't a bad budget beverage.

Perhaps the biggest surprise is the reduction from 160 milligrams of caffeine to 140. Why bother? The buzz does not suffer much from the stimulant slimming, still lasting about two hours or so. Other ingredients include taurine, B vitamins, inositol, ginseng and guarana extracts. Overall, Mega Energy by Lidl only disappoints if you have any expectations.