Sunday, August 21, 2016

E-ON Almond Rush Energy Drink Review

This frustratingly colored can is incredibly difficult to photograph, so you will just have to take my word that it is called "Almond Rush." Its grid background of disinteresting silver hides the tiny text designed for the consumer to read, but I guess it does not help that the aforesaid fonts are also argentate.

Trepidatious first sip exposes a surprisingly tasty, and familiar tasting, taste. Its citrusy with a fizzy effervescence that bodes beautifully with the furrowing acidity, something we can only assume it has to do with the tenuous two percentage of juice. Sweetness, thirty seven grams exclusively of cane sugar, does a wonderful job here, sanctioning the sourness to pucker your lips without letting it dominate the twelve ounces. We taste lemon and grapefruit, both spirited renditions both playful and earthy, as if some of their zest was mixed in to this cocktail. The organic taste has a bitter depth to it, and there is a nutty nuance beneath that, every imbibe is layered with intricacy and oddities regardless as to whether or not the experience needed them.

Each can contains: taurine, l-carnitine, guarana, B vitamins and 142 milligrams of caffeine. Any buzz lasts less than two hours, a fairly mediocre burst of energy that is kindred to hundreds of other drinks. In the end, E-ON Almond Rush tastes almost nothing like almonds, and "rush" describes neither the flavor or kick appropriately.

official site

Saturday, August 13, 2016

AMP Boosted Mandarin Orange Energy Drink Review

Dear the newest Venom drinks; THIS is what your cans should look like! Well, maybe not "look" like; its all-black can with white and orange text is ripped straight from the "energy drink cans 101" community college class, a chunk of text surprisingly difficult to read even with its large font. It is resealable, which gives this variety the coveted "cool can" label.

Ignore the "mandarin" blazing the front of the can, here we have arguably the most orange soda-like energy drink; it is elementary, sugary, and only slightly tart. That is a good thing, for this sixteen ounce experience is a fun one, elementary as in it is basic, and how youthful every sip is. But in the words of a certain Friend's character, could this be any more sweet? A petite twenty five grams is all that this cool can contains, of the HFCS creed, with its buddies sucralose and ace-k as backup; things rest on the cusp of being cloying, but also on what an orange soda should be. The fruit savor is hardly more complex than your Sunkist or Fanta, however, with its acidity slightly earthy, a reduced roughness that gives any intricacy to be found some extremely thin breathing room. Overall, this AMP is a pretty good one, 100% generic and about as safe as any energy drink could taste, but I guess I am a pushover for this kind of flavor.

Each can contains: 100 calories, let us face it, empty calories, taurine, ginseng, guarana, B vitamins, vitamin C, and 160 milligrams of caffeine. The buzz is less inspired than its flavor; oh do not get me wrong, both of them are wholly prosaic, but a two-hour kick is never as enjoyable as orange soda. To end, AMP Boosted Mandarin Orange does not give much of a boost, nor does it taste a whole lot like mandarin. It is part of the AMP line though, and it does taste like orange. It is a mild success.

official site

Friday, August 5, 2016

Mega Man E-Tank Energy Drink Review

Mega Man E-Tank is another one of those Boston America Corp. products, and its can is another shrink-wrapped one that still feels super cheap and unimpressive, considering its $3.50 plus price tag (with prices like that, you understand why there are ads on the site now). At least the design is decent and clean, but it feels as if they just tossed Mega Man and his logo on a blue-gradient background.

Lots of blue raspberry here, a puckeringly tart and nearly comically artificial, each sip has a murky lime bite and bubble gum stained sweetness. There is a distant, lingering cranberry fullness to the body, an unexpected richness to the mouthfeel and the experience's only nod to anything natural. The saccharinity, twenty seven grams of inexpensive high fructose corn syrup, distances itself from its usual syrupiness, but its texture remains uninteresting and dimensionless. Carbonation is another surprise here, a mild effervescence that helps solidify the potation's playful poise.

Each can contains: B vitamins, taurine, caffeine, guarana, ginseng, and inositol. The buzz is banausic, lasting an hour and certainly not enough to refill Mega Man's health bar. Overall, this is a licensed drink. Nothing more, and unfortunately, sometimes less.

official site

Thursday, July 28, 2016

MiO Energy Iced Mocha Java Review

After years in hibernation, the MiO line is back with new flavors, one of them being Iced Mocha Java. Here, instead of squeezing drops into just water, milk is suggested on the side of the small bottle. The idea is certainly unique, but with its packaging remaining relatively unchanged since we saw it last, the design continues to be consolidated and congested.

One percent fat milk and one squeeze render a pale Caucasian color and not the deep brown goodness anticipated. First sip is pretty good, however, with the milk adding enough fattiness and freshness to every imbibe, with the single drop adding some distant coffee infusion and more prominent sweetness, more of a diluted concoction of chocolate milk and coffee milk, rather than mocha coffee. Two squirts births a significantly more potent coffee taste, with a more nuanced mocha niceness and a pleasant bitter underbelly. Unfortunately, the fructose, sucralose and ace-k, the sweetener trilogy here, becomes overwhelmingly artificial here despite top billing by an actual sugar. It clogs your palate and requires another sip just to wash away the synthetic stain, only for it to return with that gulp. But more unsavory is the coffee itself; it tastes obviously from concentrate, and lacks honesty, depth or distinction from your parents dusty tin of pre-ground discount robusta beans. Eight ounces of water and one dose resembles ice tea more so than coffee. Taste wise, the water overpowers the single drop, adding a flavor that resembles unpurified tap water than your morning cup of joe. Adding another serving renders the cocktail practically undrinkable, with the shockingly artificial flavors found when mixed with milk augmented with the dearth of fatty richness.

Each squeeze is a serving, and contains vitamin B3, B6, B12 and sixty milligrams of caffeine. The kick is decent with enough cups and enough squeezes, but with two squirts, the kick lasts under two hours and fails to sparkle. In the end, MiO Iced Mocha Java is a great idea with a wonky execution.

official site

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Starbucks S'mores Frappuccino Chilled Coffee Drink Review

Joining the ranks of Cinnamon Dulce and White Chocolate, this Starbucks drink, a member of the company's "frappuccino" line, is one interesting flavor; s'mores. Its tall glass bottle is white, with subtle strokes of brown and golden yellow, symbolizing the burnt marshmallow portion of the campfire favorite. The milky brown of the drink itself represents the graham cracker, which leaves the chocolate part of the treat unseen, unless one of the aforesaid colors works double time and also illustrates the cacao.

Shaken well and cap softly snapped off, the fragrance of this frappuccino has a faint burnt smell buried beneath all the coffee and cream perfume. Our first sip is super saccharine, surrendering any bean or milk flavor in favor of the albino jet-puffed pillow. It has an initially fun toasted vibe, giving the impression of the fire charred confection, but what starts out as a passionate sapor quickly grows into blind violence of burned vanilla. There is absolutely no chocolate here, and the only graham is found in the outrageous toasted taste. Coffee is put on the back burner as well, influencing any ounce of the thirteen plus it can while it fights a losing battle to keep this coffee drink tasting like coffee. Fattiness is wonderful, however, four and a half heavenly grams, three of which are saturated, from part-skimmed milk and cream, and remains much of the only aspect that ever reminds you of the brand's bean brew. The sweetness is thick, an almost grainy sugariness somehow achieved only from honest sugar and the mystery "natural and artificial flavors." It coarsely brushes your tongue as it makes its way down, your palate stained of the intense roasted taste and an awful aftertaste of table sugar.

Each bottle contains: coffee, sugar, cream, flavors, maltodextrin, pectin, skim and part skim milk. To end, Starbucks S'mores Frappuccino Coffee Drink is barely coffee and barely drinkable.

official site

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Fast Energy Fountain Drink Review

This cheap fountain energy drink, found in a dumpy little convenience store where the ice dispenser is likely dirtier than both the floors and the people in line. Its sticker, representing the packing here, is what happens when you give five dollars to a failing graphic design student at the local community college; blue font on a black background, with distracting bolts of lightning interrupting the vertical text. Bromidic and lazy, but the lack of any flavor indication leaves us expecting the inevitable Red Bull clone.

The unpleasantly sweet taste of Sweet Tart candies, without the tartness, and sticky vanilla wash the entire mouth, with a medical bitterness that lingers almost as long as the extreme saccharinity. There is a hint of tartness, distant and deadened by the syntheticness and sugariness. The boring beverage gums into a mucky mess at first sip, and just gets thicker the forty four ounces are forcefully supped. You chock the gooey gunk down and, thanks to the wonderfully warm weather, the filtered crushed ice begins to melt, diluting the already weak flavor.

Tons of sugar is the only ingredient guaranteed, well, along with (probably artificial) flavoring and preservatives. Caffeine is likely, as well as guarana and ginseng, well, and some B vitamins. The kick is mostly a sugar rush, lasting two hours before the rough crash. In the end, Fast Energy is something you should run away fast from.

Monday, July 4, 2016

Realtree Outdoor Arctic Storm Energy Drink Review

This frosty can is probably the most appealing of the line, with its snowy backdrop standing out among the other varieties. It uses the updated design debuted with Bushmaster, however its arctic background resembles the ill-fated White Buck flavor from five years ago, however its use of blueand black add jazz to the albino can.

The can cracks open stinking slightly of Red Bull, however our first sip destroys any thought of the colored cattle. Its flavor is sugar, with fifty six grams of the stuff, drowning the otherwise elementary blue raspberry. Its saccharinity is all from high fructose corn syrup and sucralose, the dense, insipid sugariness clamming and bulking every imbibe, with the latter of the sweetener system never noticed. What we can taste of the fruitiness is guileless, an innocent sapor undeserving of the egregious sweetness, although, it does slightly slacken its own exaggerated simplicity. Some faded sourness rounds out the experience, the slightest relief from the irrational measure of empty carbohydrates. Tied together by a playful effervescence, RealTree had the makings of a fun energy drink, then dumped in 240 calories worth of sugar.

The kick was fine; underwhelming and unspectacular, but the rad sugar buzz, despite ending with a crash, was an old-school thrill. Each can contains: B vitamins, taurine, and caffeine. Overall, RealTree Arctic Storm is a decent looking, worse tasting, and even worse with its energy.

official site
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