Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Starbucks Caramel Iced Coffee Review

Plainly reminiscent of the two varieties before, Starbucks Caramel is largely uninteresting to look at. Of course it is clean and of course fans of the over-roasted bean brewer will distinguish it from its canned competition, but there is absolutely nothing, outside the awkward sipping bottle, that this offers visually.

I will most likely have Starbuck's lawyers banging at my door (Monster's, Rockstar's, and Red Bull's can keep 'em company), but better iced coffee has been served at Dunkin' Donuts. There is nothing in this bottle that ever even resembles coffee; watery eleven ounces of aquatic torture. The alleged addition of two percent milk provides the bromidic creaminess of coffee better drank black. Twenty grams of sugar is no where nearly enough apparently, especially for something flavored after burnt sugar. I am sick and tired of writing my disdain of these destitute drinks time after time, and when I say this is the worst of the worst, that is saying something (for those who still write like a second grader, allow me to spell it out: this beverage sucks).

Each bottle contains: coffee, milk, sugar, flavors, pectin, and ascorbic acid. This is much weaker than the average Joe's average joe, requiring more caffeine not long after. Overall- no, I cannot even wait; this drink sucks.

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