Monday, July 8, 2013

AJ's Rush Energy Drink Review

Short for "Aroma Joe's," this twelve ounce energy drink is a surprising canned entry from a small chain of coffee houses located only in a few New England states (exampled by its "it's a wicked rush" slogan). And it is a pretty generic one visually, a design preferably clean but with less personality than even most Big Lots offerings.

Quick! What year is it? 2013 you say!? Well someone should really tell the company here, because Red Bull clones have been cliche for over six years now. The scent is nauseating and forces the forbidden memories of many featured on the annual "Your Drink Sucks" list (so do not go being surprised later this year). Thinly flavored of revolting ersatz vanilla and simulacrum apple, the bromidic tastes are gloomily gummy and sorrowfully sour. The equally exhausted and exhausting elixir came cascading out of the can exhibiting an enervated effervescence and experience. The beverage is dejectedly sweet for something with thirty nine grams of sugar, authorizing a decided chemical grip that chokes any possible realism out of this already parody potable.

Each can contains: taurine, inositol, caffeine, and B vitamins. The unassuming blend provides a kick two hours and a half long, complete with jitters and something of a crash. On the whole, this is a rare energy drink in the sense that there is nothing good about it, aside from its obscurity. Only Maine and New Hampshire suffers.

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