Tuesday, January 1, 2019

Your Drink Sucks: the year 2018

We had really great energy drinks this year, but who cares?! Let us celebrate the bad ones!!

*these are not necessarily products that were released in 2018, but rather those that were reviewed in 2018.*


Full Throttle Twisted Fountain Energy Drink

People argue over the internet as to whether or not Diet Coke tastes better in a bottle or from a fountain; Full Throttle Twisted would suck either way.








Monster Rehab White Dragon Tea

The Monster brand is a semi-regular on my annual lists, and 2018 was no different. Their Rehab line's newest flavor, White Dragon, was the tamest dragon I've ever tasted.




It sucks, and should be more aptly named "Mega (Messy) Java (Barely-)Coffee (Gives little) Energy Drink(able?)"









Quick Strike Energy Drink

An energy drink based off of a movie? What could possibly go wrong? Well for starters, a terrible can, taste and kick.








Maxwell House Max 2x Boost Vanilla Iced Coffee

Coffee is supposed to be bitter, but this clumsily-named brew means I will not be stopping by the Maxwell House for anything, especially coffee.




Aspire Cranberry is actually just a mediocre energy drink, but one fatal flaw led to its appearance here; calling this "cranberry" flavored. The taste was watery and distant, and is a slap in the face to the potent holiday fruit.







SlimFast Slim Cafe Mocha Macchiato

While not a complete disaster, it comes close. So while not the worst drink reviewed this year, it comes close.









Mountain Lightning

Sometimes a drink really sucks, and other times, it is just flat-out disappointing. The fact I had expectations from a generic Mtn Dew clone energy drink spin-off is really the most concerning part here.



To this day, months after my review, I can still taste this disgusting disgrace of a drink. Congratulations Blaze, you are the worst drink reviewed in 2018. Hurah.

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