Jones Cola Soda + Caffeine Review

"Oh, hi there, Jones, long time no see."

"Huh, what was that- yeah, not since 2008 I know. I mean, thanks, you look good too."

Well, except for the fact that the label is shrink-wrapped on, and that the can clearly is frightened by the implications of calling itself an actual "energy drink." We have a sixteen ounce slab of metal here and 160 milligrams of sweet, sweet caffeine, but the closest this thing ever gets to being true to itself is "soda + caffeine." Hm, like, oh I dunno, an energy drink?

I have not had a good cola here in a long time, not since probably Jolt Cola's return back in 2019. And Jones here certainly smells the part, as if I had pressed the "dispense" button on my local favorite fast food restaurant's Coke fountain, my eyes hypnotized by the bubbly elixir as it pours into my extra large plastic cup. First sip exposes a classic taste, the caramel-colored cocktail crashing down onto your tongue with all the grace of any mass-produced soft drink. The flavor profile is standard issue, vanilla, cinnamon, cloves and lemon all mixing to create what everyone and their mom thinks of when they hear the word "cola." Carbonation is heavy and harsh, beating your palate into a numb pulp before the carbohydrates begin destroying your dental hygiene; forty seven grams of pure can sugar means this has a fantastic mouthfeel, one rich with a slight grainy texture and formidable heft. But the problem here is the use of a can used versus the company's historic preference to glass bottles, as everything has a slight metallic stain, pushing an otherwise familiar experience over the edge to one that is overly and overtly commercialized. It is tasty but unambitious.

Remember, this is not an energy drink, just a soda with 160 milligrams of caffeine. Totally different, do you hear me? The buzz is alright, lasting a bit over two hours before I began to wonder what else I had caffeinated in my fridge. Overall, Jones Cola Soda + Caffeine is classic not classy; it is what Coca-Cola Energy should have been.

company site

Bawls Guarana Ginger Review

Bawls keeps on rolling, pun intended, with their soda-inspired varieties. This time ginger ale is attempted, its dull green bottle unfortunately resembling a macro beer more so than a soda. But it feels wonderful in the hand, the small bumps giving this beverage transport the texture the Monster brand often stumbles with.

With both a strong ginger taste and saccharinity, Bawls tastes more like Vernors than Canada Dry, but that is okay- how many golden ginger ales can you think of, let alone have caffeine? High fructose corn syrup does the sweetening here, but that never bothered my tongue; it adds to the slightly gummy mouthfeel of many commercial sodas. Simplicity is key here, no nuance to distract from the bubbly goodness; there may not be a lot going on here, it is just a ginger ale, but it is a rarity in the realm of caffeinated potations done well.

Thirty one grams of sugar, some guarana, and an internet-sourced sixty four milligrams of caffeine. And for those who crack open every crazy Mtn Dew variety only to be disappointed, then Bawls Ginger should work.

official site

Mtn Dew Kickstart Original Dew Review

Whether or not Original Dew, the latest Kickstart variety, is much different from their earlier Limeade version has yet to be seen, but the can hits all the right notes for Mtn Dew fans. Its classic color scheme, citrus flavor and familiar logo surely will have more traditional customers giving this drink a whirl, but it is a disappointingly safe flavor.

Many little bubbles greet your tongue, an explosion of effervescence that dies into a more palatable carbonation, an aerated excuse to bring that recognizable blend of lemon, lime and orange to our taste buds. It is a cleaner cocktail of that usual Mtn Dew taste, significantly less syrupy than your usual can of the neon colored cooler, but not as deadenedly sweet as your typical bottle of its diet brother. It hangs somewhere in the middle of the two extremes, showcasing the sweet citruses, but there is the problem- they are just not very interesting. Sure, if you have a Mtn Dew itch to scratch, pick up a can, but do not go expecting anything even remotely different; you have had this flavor before, from the same company!

Each can contains ninety milligrams of caffeine, in addition to some B vitamins. The kick is what you always get from these energy sodas, lasting an hour and being of middling strength. What is the point here?! That is the question I kept asking myself here, from the time I purchased the drink to when I tossed the can.

official site

Monster Mutant Super Soda White Lightning Review

After two varieties with nearly three hundred calories each, Monster Mutant debuts White Lightning, their currently sole offering to diet drinkers. Its bottle remains the same, save for its opaque albino colored fluid and lightning strikes across its label.

The packaging offers little in way of a cohesive explanation of the flavor here, aside from the cheesy "catch lightning in a bottle" line I read on the back of the label. The flavor my palate disclosed is mostly grapefruit and lemon, a very soda-like taste that should only appeal to Mtn Dew fans looking or an alternative- not energy drink drinkers looking for a bit less caffeine. Its effervescence is curt and everlasting, right down to the last few gulps, but the flavor is dead in the carbonated water. It is maddeningly muted, a taste that your tongue will spend the entire twenty ounces searching for more than what is actually here. Ace-k and sucralose do the sweetening here, but it is a tepid mixture that offers little weight; its only interaction is the addition of a synthetic cloak that veils any possible realism the blend sometimes can achieve.

Each bottle contain some B vitamins and 115 milligrams of caffeine. Being an energy soda, the kick is decent, lasting an hour, perhaps a bit longer. Overall, Mutant Super Soda White Lightning wants to be a sort of "my first energy drink," but there are far too many soda influences here to ever be anything else.

official site

Mtn Dew Kickstart Mango Lime Review

Mtn Dew Kickstart Mango Lime sounds like a refreshing flavor, at first glance. But any avid caffeinated cocktail connoisseur would recognize a similar flavor on last year's Game Fuel, aptly titled "Mango Heat." But its can at least has nuance of both of its titular fruits, though I cannot help but wonder if the design's favor towards one color will extend into the flavor.

The taste is potent, a curt blast of ersatz mango deluges the palate in thinly viscid high fructose corn syrup. The mango is entirely synthetic to the tongue, lacking the subtly and depth of the real stone fruit; each sip is a bland reminder that "natural and artificial flavors" does not translate to the joy that is biting into the actual fleshy interior of the South Asia native. There is five percent juice here, something the can makes mention of multiple times, but it is only of white grape and orange, and that is not the flavor here! Their role here is only in adding an ounce of realism, but honestly the honesty in every imbibe is insalubriously saccharine. There is no lime taste, no citrus flavor actually despite the presence of orange nectar, sealing the fate of this energy soda as one-note.

Each can contains: B vitamins, vitamin C, and ninety milligrams of caffeine. The buzz of this Mtn Dew extension have always been its weakest attribute (no wait that would still be their flavor), lasting an hour and a half after a good night of sleep. On the whole, Kickstart Mango Lime is the epitome of false advertising: it does not taste like lime and does very little energizing.

official site

Monster Mutant Super Soda Red Dawn Review

Mutant Super Soda Red Dawn is a most brazen attempt at impeding Mtn Dew's Code Red from reaching the grasps of those wanting a sugary and caffeinated soda. Its bottle is not half bad, actually, surprisingly simple from a company so inclined at supplying mundane textures and silly paragraphs of text on their products. But the flavor name "Red Dawn" is so small and hard to see, leaving its color scheme as the products only flavor identification.

Seventy two grams of sugar, all the riled high fructose corn syrup, is just too much, proving that there is such thing as too sweet; the ingredients list mention that it has a "low sodium" content, at just three percent your daily intake, but that number appears just above its whopping twenty five percent carbohydrate content. The flavor is stagnant, a distilled and dreadfully deadened cherry taste, no nuance to the fruit nor any acidity- there is just your generic drupe flavor and drowns in the acute saccharinity. Effervescence is feisty and tickles the back of your throat as you gulp the frisky fluid, and the bubbliness of the beverage is easily its best characteristic.

290 calories and 115 milligrams of caffeine, as well as the aforementioned sugar quantity, make up the ingredient cocktail here, though it is more like "bland energy" than an "energy blend." Any buzz lasts at most an hour, giving its significantly more common competitor nothing to worry about when it comes to pretending to be an energy supplement.

 official site

Monster Mutant Soda Review

Monster's new product its most unique and its most uninspired; Mutant Super Soda. Separate from any in the brand, this neon green potation is an obvious attempt to knock Pepsi's Mtn Dew out of first place from caffeinated soda market. But the bottle here is so brazen, from its curvy bottle to its coloring, not just of Mtn Dew but also of the effervescent relics like MDX or Vault, with their promises of feeling "energized" and all that corporate puffery.

First sip is astonishingly familiar, an initially refreshing but entirely trite cross between Mtn Dew and Coca-Cola's Sprite. Grapefruit and lime are the dominates here, with an underbelly of lemon and a touch of pineapple. It is a less congruous potable than its adversary, with each fruit tasted after one another, instead of as one, with the blunt seams holding the flavor together by a threadbare thread. Sweetness, seventy grams of it, all high fructose corn syrup, is overbearing, establishing an egregiously syrupy experience that only thickens as sips are taken. There is actually less sugar here than its main competitor, seven grams less, but with the same amount of calories, Mutant stands as a missed opportunity to create a gut-friendly Dew corrival.

Each twenty ounce bottle contains 290 calories and 115 milligrams of caffeine, more than Mtn Dew's 91. But it is far from a noticeable bump, and just makes you wish you had drank an energy drink over this retread energy soda.

official site

Mtn Dew Kickstart Midnight Grape Review

The newest of the sixteen ounce Kickstarts, Midnight Grape's can fits right at home with its older siblings. The purple to black gradient looks pretty fantastic, however the transport's organization leaves something to be desired. The words "Mtn Dew," "Kickstart" and "Midnight Grape" are haphazardly laid about the can, leaving our eyes to piece together its name and to capture the actual flavor out of that decent chunk of text.

The flavor is smooth, with high fructose corn syrup sweetening without imbuing every imbibe with much of a gummy or sticky texture. It surely lacks the grainy nuance or heft of real, pure sugar, but with ace-k and sucralose as its sweetening partners, each sip is not as bad as you would maybe expect. There is only the slightest sourness to any given gulp, and the effervescence's dullness leaves the liquid lackadaisically lounging on the tongue. Well, many sentences in and... did we forget something? That we did, and it would be the actual taste. Grape allegedly is and when I say allegedly, I mean how the flavor dissipates into a sappy, saccharine sensation upon each splash of the purple colored concoction. Pepsico, the producers behind the brand, are no virgins to the vine-grown vegetation, making both Amp and your normal Mtn Dew grade-flavored potations. however they do so here without class, skill, or fun.

The kick to this Kickstart does not do much kicking, lasting an hour maybe, thanks to only: potassium, eighty calories and ninety milligrams of caffeine. On the whole, Mtn Dew Kickstart Midnight Grade occupies a midpoint between energy drink and soda, failing as either and as its own.

official site

Mtn Dew Kickstart Strawberry Kiwi Review

Strawberry Kiwi is the second of the coconut water-containing Mtn Dew Kickstarts, a smaller can sold for the same price due to the aforementioned artifice and slightly higher juice content. The design is unexciting however, the red and white complementing each other nicely, but ultimately filled with too much text written at too many incongruous angles.

Aroma-wise, it is fantastic; really pushing the verisimilitude of the meager juice content. Surprisingly this extends to the flavor as well, tasting predominately of the strawberry but dominating without remorse. Kiwi is but text on the can, never influencing any of the sips and wasting space on the aluminum transport of this twelve ounce beverage. Its magisterial sapor is bereft of the depth needed to keep palates stimulated for the entire experience, despite its undiluted focus on the sole harvest. With its fourteen grams of sugar and synthetic sweetener blend of sucralose and ace-k, the taste wisely mimics the fruit instead of some candy-store impersonation; its sweetness simply could not handle any other interpretation of the flavor. Coconut water gives the few final sips a slight gooey texture and sour savor, especially unpleasant if the drink warms by then.

Each can contains only: caffeine (sixty eight milligrams), B vitamins, and vitamin C. For a flavor so focused on one taste, it is a shame the kick does not have the same level of dedication; a buzz lasting around an hour. Overall, Mtn Dew Kickstart Strawberry Kiwi hardly kicks and lacks any kiwi.

official site

Bawls Guarana Orange Review

Bawls is back with another soft drink-inspired flavor, this time orange and the second one after their estimable root beer variety. Its glass bottle continues to feel fabulous in the palm, heavy but grips well with its studded circumference. It is a cleaner design than most, the clear glass cruet allows for the phosphorescent liquid to tell your eyes the flavor without the need of much text.

Sweetness is king in this ten ounce offering, a strong saccharinity never syrupy despite its high fructose corn syrup purity. Perhaps what destroys any slimy texture is the rough effervescence; it is of the curtest carbonation, waking up your tongue and perfectly setting the stage for its flavor. That flavor is orange of course, a relentless imitation of the fruit, each splash of the unyielding liquid painting palates with citrus unsulliedness. Depth is disregarded for a greater citrus concentration, each sip tasting the same as the last and the one upcoming. A tempered tartness eases none of the flavor exclusivity, an experience ignorant of those who thirst for something more diverse as their potation of choice. Doesn't sound like you? Yeah, it doesn't sound like me either.

Guarana, sixty four milligrams of caffeine and thirty three grams of sugar is all we get from this pop, but for the likes of Mtn Dew and Surge drinkers, that is enough. To end, Bawls Guarana Orange's simplicity is meritable, but will not change the opinion of those who do not reach for Sunkist or Fanta from the cooler.

official site

Mtn Dew Kickstart Pineapple Orange Mango Review

For the Mtn Dew Kickstart line's plural of new flavors, we lose four ounces in favor of a new coconut water gimmick. How that will affect the taste and kick is yet to be discovered, but we can discuss how the new direction influences the can design. Its brighter color scheme is implicative of the line's breakfast origins, a cheery look that nevertheless disappoints after the edgier Cherry and Lime varieties.

Curt carbonation is rough so early on palates, a sterile cocktail mostly of mango and orange. Every splash submerges you in an experience of equal proportion, a binary braid braided so perfectly you never see the seams stitching the two tastes together. But it is a feeble flavor who takes zero chances with depth or complexity, no rogue nuances or ambagious pulpiness. Little of the namesake pineapple tangos with the predominate fruits, the prudent produce adds only some tartness to the otherwise prosaic punch. High fructose corn syrup sweetens but no sip is syrupy, maybe it is the juice or perhaps the breviloquent effervescence. Whatever the case, never does a mouthful feel like its can should read Mtn Dew. White grape and coconut water provide the trumpeted ten percent of nectar, but your palate is only ever reminded when your eyes read the herald fact.

Each can contains: caffeine (sixty eight milligrams), vitamin C and B vitamins. For those health conscious, add sixty calories from fourteen grams of sugar. The kick is without a doubt the weakest link here, lasting less than an hour. Dear Mtn Dew, that is definitely not the "right about of kick." But to be fair, the Kickstart line has never gotten that right.

official site

Mtn Dew Kickstart Black Cherry Review

The crayon maroon color complements the black, working particularly well with the gradient. The red is bright and creamy but much too adolescent for the aggressive design.

Inviting perfumes lead to the sweet bliss of black cherry, a flavor startlingly balanced and enjoyable from the Mtn Dew company. The beverage's trivial juice content of five percent is from the bulking white grape, and there is even the infamous HFCS that turns soda into syrup. None of that matters here; every sip is emotionally sweet for only all the right reasons, candying a brusk fruit into an innocently surfaced experience, complete with the delicate depth of a tart underbelly. This is an honest energy drink, as complicated but considerably more sophisticated than you would ever expect from the brand.

Eighty calories and ninety two milligrams of caffeine are contained in the sixteen ounce transport, skimpy enough of food energy but flaccid when it comes to a buzz. A stronger pop than energy drink and occupies a awkward place between the two, Mtn Dew Black Cherry Kickstart never really starts kicking.

official site

Mtn Dew Kickstart Limeade Review

A fresh coat of paint truly livens this design, even when the basics remains identical. The lone gradient is awesome, as is the complementing color scheme, giving things a darker, cooler feel. This is a much edgier piece of aluminum than its ancestors, although limeade is even further astray from breakfast than was fruit punch.

Sips are powerfully effervescent, pleasant but playing almost too roughly. They splash the tongue with the tart taste of lime, a hint of artificiality beneath its sweetness. The can hails the inclusion of electrolytes are for taste, but they do not seem to add anything to the experience. Resembling your traditional Mtn Dew considerably more than its predecessors, less saccharine and a heck of a lot less syrupy with a slightly more substantial mouthfeel. This is a more mature, almost craft soda take on the famous citrus pop, only not as good as it should be.

As much an energy drink as its parent brand is, the ninety two milligrams of caffeine never feels like enough. The weak kick harks way back to the company's infamous MDX days, as does the taste and, well, everything else, with about as much overall appeal.

official site

Chill Zone NRG Kick Review

Not only did I struggle to decide on what its name is, Chill Zone NRG Kick calls itself both an energy drink and a soda, with neither label ever truly being correct. Sure, 170 milligrams of caffeine is adequate, equating to any underwhelming energy drink, but coming in your typical resealable plastic bottle it just can't escape feeling like one of those oft mediocre energy sodas. Furthering the confusion is the beverage's origins, which date back to being a fountain frozen slush, something that's still available.

Each sip chokes thanks to the dieter's nightmare of seventy eight grams of sugar, with the resulting drink resembling flavoured corn syrup more so than anything else. Okay, well perhaps "flavoured" isn't the right word, as the resinous refreshment lacks any actual taste, at least any immediately specific, and instead pierces the tongue with bland saccharine shrapnel. Cherry, lime, and orange are, or at least can be, identified, all with a candy coating that masks their honest complexion and swap their possible distinctiveness for dumbfounding sameness. Things are carbonated but only to a certain extent, and it doesn't help lessen its weight as it swims across your tongue. Overall and unless you didn't already pick up on it, I did not like the taste of Chill Zone NRG Kick.

Other than the aforementioned stimulant, each bottle also contains various B vitamins, taurine, and inositol, with the kick being very much pedestrian, lasting less than three hours. In the end, hill Zone NRG Kick isn't worth its 310 calories or its budget price tag.

official site

Bawls Guarana Exxtra Review

By having light blue text, no visuals, and both clear glass and liquid, Bawls Guarana Exxtra isn't optically exciting or attention grabbing. It's a rather bland design that unfortunately keeps the flagon from exploiting its physical uniqueness, because the eyes are always too distracted by the boring appearance.

None of the sips render much pleasure, as they, like its bottle, are wholly insipid. Sure, there is the slightest mention of the vanilla, but unlike the acclaimed original variety, there is no succulent richness or detailed profile. There's also an inexact representation of kiwi who's positioned kindred to a vapid description of strawberry, and both are impotent and watery. They don't actually taste synthetic, but they expectedly ignore their natural peculiarities, which results in them not being proper portrayals. The saccharinity is achieved via sucralose and ace-k, normally an outstanding imitation blend, but here they're ineffectual at properly sugaring each individual flavour. It's not to suggest that it tastes very artificial, which it impressively does not, but it's unfortunately surprising when the actual fruits are far sweeter than flavours in a soft drink. Overall, Bawls Guarana Exxtra is extraordinarily bland and disappointingly so.

Ninety six milligrams of caffeine and guarana can only create so strong of a buzz, but then again why bring this up if this isn't an energy drink? All in all, while Bawls Guarana Exxtra has the highest caffeine content of the line, it isn't worth suffering through the monotonous flavour for.

official site

Bawls Guarana Geek Beer Review

Bawls Geek Beer's appearance is easily the best of the line, with the brownness of the actual bottle not only bridging a visual connection to root beers, but to real beer. The rather clever name, using leet speak, also immediately grabs the attention of who it wants, but it does this without sacrificing the general population, and it's this balance between niche and marketability that makes it perhaps the companies most focused product, at least optically.

Utilizing one of my favourite soda flavours, Geek Beer tastes much like any mass produced brand. There is a strong artificial sassafras depiction that's rough but appropriately so, and it's adjacent to an equally sham vanilla. The latter presents a good level of creaminess that, while itself is equivalently counterfeit, saturates the experience with characteristics that are natural to the flavour genre it belongs to, but what really exaggerates this is the bite, which here is done adequately. Underlying spices, such as cinnamon and nutmeg, are easy to notice, but there is also notes of birch bark and wintergreen to give the piquancy its complexity. The latter of the two, however, seems to broaden the taste of the former, albeit mildly, and now there are essentially two separate soda flavours coexisting, but their inherited and undeniable similarities gives the leveled dyad a complementing sense of fluidity. The intricacy is further deepened by the crisp citrus demonstration from the guarana, and although this fruitiness is indistinct, it isn't exactly utilized or intended to be anything else but something that enriches indirectly. Overall, there's a complex flavour here, yes, but the soda calls for this by nature, and Geek Beer never exactly thinks outside the box.

Much like all varieties before it, there isn't much energy, but since it isn't expected nor is it intended, there really isn't much else for me to say. Overall, Bawls Guarana Geek Beer isn't anything particularly interesting for the soda it's based off, other than being one of the very few caffeinated root beers.

official site

Bawls Guarana Caffeinated Soda Review

What exactly is Bawls? Well, it's a highly caffeinated premium beverage that's much alike those generally unsuccessful energy sodas that were experimented with a few years ago, though the blue drink has survived much longer than Mtn Dew MDX did. It comes in a rather attractive glass bottle, aiding in the aforementioned distinguishing superiority, and it smartly avoids congestion, which is the thing I most often criticize about a product's appearance.

The first sip was agreeably pleasing and surprisingly rich, if not creamy to taste. But that isn't to insinuate the presence of dairy or something, but rather that the fluid's smoothness is so laudable that it begins to positively resemble that of fatty milk. The flavour, however, is much of vanilla, which benefits hugely from the just prior, but the second most expensive spice isn't the only thing greeting your taste buds. There is a miscellany of fruits to note, with lemon and lime being prominent but not dominating. White grape, strawberry, and kiwi are transiently communicated with and their discussions bring depth even though their mentions are exceptionally mild, if not merely suggestions, even when compared to the already feeble binary of citruses. The general sugariness isn't syrupy despite the generous use of HFCS, and impressively the experience is never too sacchariferous. The flavour closes with an equally enjoyable bite of cloves and the sweet pungency of nutmeg, and although neither are at all distinct, they do ingrain redolent piquancy into the experience. Overall, Bawls Guarana tastes much of the latter of its name, but partially in addition to the nontraditional manipulations of the otherwise average fruits and flavours.

There is guarana and sixty four milligrams of caffeine powering each bottle, which honestly but expectedly isn't comparable to your typical energy drink. That can't be used against them, though, as it never claims to be one, so if compared to your typical Mountain "style" soda, then it is quite a bit stronger. All in all, Bawls Guarana has a bit of an identity crisis, being caught behind energy drinks in terms of potency while also costing more than your usual caffeinated soda, but it doesn't change that its trademark yet niche taste is hugely likeable.

official site

Game Juice Energy Soda Review

Game Juice markets itself as being the gap between soda and energy drinks, which is something Mtn. Dew did with MDX, and something Coke has with Vault. So it's safe to say that Game Juice isn't alone, and despite MDX not being around anymore, Vault is sure to be tough competition. And with a name like "Game Juice" and a bottle like this one, I'm betting on Vault. The name implies the content of juice, but there's none, so we're left to assume that it implies that this is the juice to gamers, which I'll admit is clever in that sense, but it is sure to scare off some with the latter of the name. Its bottle is a slender sixteen point nine oz., and its label isn't very tall nor is it very good. The bare gray looks decent enough with the green and black, but other other then some text and some guy wearing a hoodie, there's nothing exciting and makes you wish the company licensed some video game properties to feature.

Apple with Ginger is the alleged flavour, and upon first sip that's somewhat confirmed. Initially, the liquid is watery and syrupy sugary, vastly similar to those cheap Kool Aid Burst knock offs. A lightly tart apple is the only flavour to the sugar water, and it's kept overly syrupy to the point where it goes beyond possibly being a guilty pleasure. The apple is highly artificial tasting and it lacks any sort of crisp nature or sourness in favour of focus on the sweetness. The experience goes on not much longer once it gets overbearing(which is quick), but it ends so thickly and cloyingly syrupy that each sip becomes more and more of a chore. There's a sugar enamel left coating your teeth, tongue, your entire mouth, and within the walls of the glaze is a heavily compressed form of what we had previously worked so hard to get down. Overall, while Game Juice really wasn't that bad, taste-wise, its syrupy sweetness was so exhausting and unbearable that I kept getting flashbacks to drinks like amp Tradin Paint.

Game Juice isn't an energy drink, but instead an energy soda(and last time I checked soda is a drink), so less ingredients and amounts was expected, but I would have never expected the caffeine content to be so low. Eighteen milligrams per eight oz., which factors to be thirty six per bottle, which is low for a soda in general, not to mention an energy soda. Putting into perspective that Diet Coke contains thirty one milligrams eight oz., it really makes you wonder why they even bothered adding caffeine in the first place. Other ingredients include: taurine, inositol, and B vitamins. In the end, there are far better, and by better I mean better everything, energy sodas available for less than what I paid for Game Juice; $1.98.

official site

Bawls Guarana Exxtra

Other than the fact that I'm too lazy to get a new energy drinks to review, its that I've been having trouble finding new energy drinks to review. Big Lots, the Dollar Tree, Wal*Mart have all had the same energy drinks for the longest time, so finding new ones to review is beginning to become a chore. That's why there's been a long time between reviews lately. And the pressure of doing another review was getting larger with every day that passed, so I finally found a review that I did a while ago, but I thought it was too short, and decided not to publish it, but with the lack of new energy drinks around me, I figured I try to beef it up with more details and release it. So here is the long lost Bawls Guarana Exxtra review, enjoy.


One line of "energy" drinks I never got around to fully review is Bawls. While I have reviewed Bawls Cherry, I haven't reviewed any others, until today when I decided to review Bawls Guarana Exxtra. Now, I know that Bawls isn't an energy drink per say, its just an overly caffeinated drink, that apparently got a make over, and part of that make over is fifty percent more caffeine. And what better way to make some crazed psycho who calls him self the "Caffeine King" than putting fifty percent more caffeine? Give me some else besides my hand to show me love? Yeah, the second one...

FIRST IMPRESSION: The cans not offensive, but nothing spectacular. The white works well with the blue-ness of the logo, but it looks too sugar free. When you glance at the can, your immediate thought is that its sugar free. This isn't a good sign. Though, on the bright side, it doesn't trick you into thinking your getting a sugared version...3/5

TASTE: The taste is best described as seltzer water with a hint of sweetness. The flavour isn't strong and goes way very quickly. You can't taste the artificial sweeteners in it. Overall, the taste is pretty decent, but only if you enjoy seltzer water. I do find that its easier to drink than regular seltzer water, though this may be because of its hint of sweetness...3/5

KICK: Each can contains only... well, 150 mg. of caffeine. That's it, no vitamins, minerals, no taurine, nothing but caffeine. This mi-ingredient gave a terribly weak buzz, that lasted around an hour or two. Bawls simply can't compete with the other energy drinks, though they do have there own niche in the market...2/5

FINAL WORD: Overall, I feel that Bawls Guarana Exxtra is a decent drink, though its still not the best out there. For $1.99, and your looking for a powerful energy drink, you might as well stick with a Monster or a RockStar. I will how ever give them credit were credit is due, I don't know of any other drink that has the balls to name there drink Bawls.

official site

Bawls Guarana Cherry

Wow, I haven't had this is a while. This is one of the drinks that I drank quite some time ago and didn't review(along with some of the other Bawls products).

FIRST IMPRESSION: First things first, the can and name are pretty unique. We could say they got the bawls to name a drink Bawls. I give the appearance a 4/5

TASTE: The smell isn't all that strong, kinda a light cherry smell. But the taste is... weird. Its like cherry seltzer, which was gross... at first. But after a couple sips, I started to enjoy the taste. You can taste the guarana taste in there... I give the taste a 3/5

KICK: Well providing that this only has caffeine to provide a good kick, which isn't good. But look on the bright side, my kidneys are happy for not having a lot of taurine to clean. I give the kick a 2.5/5

FINAL WORD: Personally, I think this is a pretty good drink. Although the lack of many energy drink ingredients isn't good, but I can live with out them... i give this a 3.5/5